The Blessing of Children

A Dream I Hold Dear

flowers-in-rain-desktop-wallpapers

In my last post, I talked about not letting your dreams die. Now, old dreams might change and have to be reinvented into new ones; but, the passion that fuels those dreams–both old and new–remains intact, and THAT is what we do not let go of. We simply redirect it into another conduit. Let me tell you about one of my dreams that has had to change, but which I refuse to give up on.

At a young age, I picked up the book Gianna: Aborted . . . and Lived to Tell About It at a Christian bookstore, bought it, and devoured it in about a day.

My heart was tortured with the knowledge that a woman would try to kill her precious little baby. I hated abortion with all my young heart. And I still do.

But what could I do about it?

I thought myself too young to be able to make any difference. So, while I continued hating it just as much as ever, I resigned myself to the idea that it was an evil too big for any one person to put a dent in. And that’s probably true. But, now that I’m older, I’ve come to see that, just as with slavery, it will take many people working tirelessly together, over a period of many years, and weathering many fierce storms, to see an end to such wickedness.

And, just as with slavery, it is not just the action itself that needs to be condemned, but the very ideology that initially led to its being accepted in the first place. Do you see what I mean? For slavery to be accepted, people first had to see the black person as less than human. Outlawing slavery got rid of some of the problems, but many problems continued to persist into the 20th Century. Why? Because many folks still thought of black people in the same way. They saw them as inferior. The way we think about something influences how we treat that something–or someone.

Now, take the unborn. Abortion is accepted because people see the tiny child growing in his or hers mother’s womb as less than human, as inferior. To combat this evil, we must not only make it illegal to abort a baby, we must also show people that babies are human beings with just as much value as the rest of us. We need to believe that they are worthy of the same treatment and love we ourselves think we deserve.

My dream was never fully articulated; all I knew was that I wanted to do something about it–I wanted to protect the babies of the world, just like many people wanted to abolish slavery. How I would do that, I didn’t know. The dream lay fallow. I grew up; met a handsome man; had children; got married (yes, in that order, though I’m not proud of it); became a housewife. If I was ever going to make a difference, surely it would never be possible now. But, what if it could?

I transferred my love of the unborn, to my own. As I feel each baby growing in my safe, warm womb, I cherish him or her with the love and tenderness all aborted babies everywhere deserved from their own mothers. I know that maybe my circumstances are not as drastic or as desperate as theirs; but I do my best to accept my own situation in life as it is. I do what they should have done; and that, in my own small way, is how I fight abortion. That is my way of continuing the dream I began all those years ago. But, there’s more.

sleeping_little_baby_1920x1200

As mentioned above, I eventually realized that the reason our society has accepted abortion is because it views babies as inferior beings. And I discovered that this is a poison present not only in our society, but in the mind of the Christian, as well. What? Christians are the ones fighting to end abortion, right? Yes, and No. While they fight to end the action of abortion (kind of like fighting to end the institution of slavery) many of them fail to address the root concern: the way we think about the unborn.

Yes, they consider the child still in his or her mother’s womb a human being. But, they do not truly cherish babies. What I mean to say, is that they fight against killing babies once they’ve been conceived, while at the same time trying to keep them from being conceived in the first place through birth control, including “Natural” Family Planning. In their minds, a person is only valuable once he or she is conceived (and even then, some Christians treat the child’s rights as inferior to their own); but, a person is not valuable as a prospect. Christians everywhere dislike the prospect of having children.

So, when you get down to it, many Christians do not really value children. They are hypocrites. I used to be one, too. How can you love someone you try to prevent? How can you protect the rights of someone  you worked night after night to reject? Are we the society that says “blacks” should be free, but let’s not let them get too heady about it? Are we the society that says “blacks” should be free, but let’s not let them breed too many children and overrun the world’s population? Are we liars–haters of mankind while we claim to love it?

inherentlyvaluable

Swirling and spiraling upward, my dream was transformed into a thundercloud of fury and passion. Fury, because I still hate abortion just as much as I did when I was a little girl. And passion, because I want every Christian, including myself, to love children just as much before they’re born as after; and just as much before they’re conceived as after. I want us to love the idea of children in our minds, so that we can truly love them once they “get here,” with our actions. That is in part why I write on this blog; I cling to the hope that others will catch the fire of this dream and help it to spread.

mlk1

If you agree with this message, if this is your dream as well, please be bold enough to spread the message (and live it out in your own life). Abortion is wrong, and birth control is wrong. Get rid of one and you will affect the other as a natural course, since abortion is the logical conclusion of contraception; it is what they do when birth control fails. And birth control causes us to devalue human life in the womb because it influences us to regard it as something “controlable” and within our “right” to manage, totally disregarding both God’s right over human life and the baby’s (meaning, person’s) right to exist. And though I don’t approve of having children outside of marriage, let’s be consistent–birth control is not good for anyone, married, or not. In fact, if birth control were not available, we would have less promiscuity and all other sorts of wicked behavior.

Advertisements

18 thoughts on “A Dream I Hold Dear

  1. I take birth control, but I am single, a Christian, and any relationship I ever will be in will not involve anything like that. I take it for my skin, to help regulate my hormones…should this be something I stop just when I get married, or can it negatively affect me now?

    Like

    1. Dear Ariana,
      Here’s a book I recommend (The Consumer’s Guide to the Pill and Other Drugs):
      https://www.amazon.com/Consumers-Guide-Pill-Other-Drugs/dp/1890712256
      It will help you navigate through the data about the pill. Also, here is a great website dedicated to informing women of the Pill’s very dangerous risks: http://thepillkills.org/pillkills.php
      There are many risks associated with its usage, among them breast cancer, cervical cancer, and blood clots! I would ask, do you really need to use the pill for your skin and to regulate your hormones, if there might be safer ways of managing those issues through natural means? I mean, for your skin you could look into decreasing sugar and white flour intake, and cleansing with tea tree oil https://www.youngliving.com/en_US/products/tea-tree-melaleuca-alternifolia, among other things. You can also investigate natural ways of regulating your hormones.
      If you stay on the pill now, you will most likely keep on it once you’re married. Force of habit will be hard to break, and if you have not studied, you will simply not know what else to use. I think the best time to look into this issue is right now.
      Jessica

      Like

      1. The problem is that the medical profession regard the contraceptive effect as a benefit, with no moral dimension, whereas for Christian women (if they are married or contemplating marriage) there are a much wider range of issues. Both moral (birth control being a sin if you are married) and in terms of your husband’s wishes.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Oh, there’s so much I want to say on this topic. I have read several of your blog posts on this topic and have wanted to ask you about my situation. I have always had extreme periods-heavy heavy bleeding and debilitating cramps. Every month since I started menstruating, I have two days where I am good for nothing. When I was in school, I consistently missed 2 days a month, and now my husband must miss work to take care of my kids. I was put on birth control as a teenager to ease my periods, and when my husband and I were ready to have kids I stopped. We have three kids now and my heavy painful periods are back with a vengeance. I am now back on birth control to ease them so I don’t miss days and my husband doesn’t have to miss work. So I have this physical issue working against me, but there’s more. My husband doesn’t want anymore kids. My pregnancies were extremely hard on me physically and I also suffered bad post partum depression. I’ve gone through it three times now, and he doesn’t want to go through it with me again. He has also never wanted many kids even though I would like more. He is considering sterilization. I am 90% sure I won’t be able to change his mind this time. I am conflicted because I must submit to my husbands authority. If his decision goes against Gods law, I should not follow his decision (as I understand it), but this is one thing I can’t do that. I need my husband in order to make more children. So do I follow God and obey my husband about not having more kids or do I follow God and try to convince my husband to have more kids. Also, in regards to the birth control, I am using it to treat physical issues, can birth control be ok for this situation? Also, this birth control I’m on now is actually an iud. The literature and the doctor promised that it does not abort a baby (I told him I wasn’t getting it if it aborted) it keeps the sperm and egg from meeting. But everyone around me is trying tto convince me that all IUDs abort. I’m so confused and full of guilt. I don’t know what to do. Do I suffer every month and my husband miss work every month because my periods are unbearable, or is it acceptable to be on the birth control?

    Like

    1. Dear Mariel,
      Here’s an article I wrote that touches on the topic of whether or not to submit to your husband in the matter of birth control:
      https://truthathome.wordpress.com/2016/05/21/how-do-i-lovingly-submit-to-my-husband-when-we-disagree-family-planning/
      I wrote it some time ago, and since then, I’ve discovered that condoms and spermicides may be related to pre-clampsia https://truthathome.wordpress.com/2017/02/21/another-reason-to-never-use-condoms-or-spermicides/
      The IUD irritates the lining of the uterus so that if a sperm and egg unite and form a baby, the baby has no where to implant, and is therefore “lost” (dies). That’s murder. Yes, you must submit to your husband, but that doesn’t include murder. Here’s a link to the site The Pill Kills, for information about the birth control pill and how it literally kills babies and women: http://thepillkills.org/pillkills.php
      The IUD works in a similar way as the pill sometimes does (but the IUD functions this way all the time), by irritating the lining of the uterus and making it “inhospitable” to attachment by a baby. I would strongly recommend you do more research on the IUD, and spend much time studying what the Bible says about having children, along with prayer. This is such a serious issue, and deserves the soberest attention. Talk openly with your husband about this. Ask him to study this with you. Share what you find with him. Commit your way to the Lord, and be prepared to do whatever He shows you (in His word) to do. I will be praying for you, Mariel! If you have any further questions, please feel free to ask!
      Jessica

      Like

    2. As for extremely heavy periods, this is something I have not studied yet (I do not suffer from it myself), but I wonder if there are natural means of helping with this problem? I’m sorry I don’t have an answer for you on this, but as I said with the IUD issue, I recommend you take the time to study this in depth.
      Jessica

      Like

  3. The Catholic Church teaching on this generally is that there is nothing wrong with the use of a medicine, used as a treatment for a genuine ailment which has as a ‘side effect’ preventing conception as long as there is no possibility that it might cause harm to a child who has been conceived. Although I personally believe that Christian doctors should be very much less ready to prescribe drugs which cause infertility (temporary or permanent) to married women.

    Ariana – As long as you are not married I can’t see any harm, but (and this is my personal view) it would be good to find alternatives which do not impact your natural cycle and certainly I would want to stop taking anything which might impact your natural fertility well before marriage.

    Mariel – poor you – I have had very heavy periods since becoming a mother (though nothing like yours) so I have a lot of sympathy. It is very difficult I think when our duty (as I see it) to be open to life is in potential conflict with our caring for our children and even more so when a husband does not share your conviction. Taking the second point first I think we do have a duty to submit to our husband, but not to positively aid, abet or partake in sin. You should make it absolutely clear that you wish submit to God in deciding if you have more children, but if he insists on being sterilised it is ultimately his sin not yours.

    Regarding your medication if you have made every humanly possible effort to ensure that your medication cannot cause abortion, you should not feel guilty.

    Like

  4. Sweet friend,
    I was in tears reading this. This prompted me to send an email to my sweet husband, and with bated breath, I await his response. And that is, would he be upset if I stopped taking birth control and allowed God to make the decisions for us? I am frightened, because all these years I had my life laid out for me. Now that the veil has been pulled from my eyes, I see clearer now. You help in so many ways. With my age, my health, finances, and housing, there are major decisions always to be made. But you are right, if we do God’s will, He will take care of us. Because every baby deserves nothing more than our unconditional love. xoxo

    Liked by 1 person

    1. In Switzerland where i live abortion is legsl for 15 years now.
      Every year 13 000 children torn into pieces ,beheaded, poisoned!!! Over 15 years this adds up to ~200 000 people slaughtered. Out of a population of ~8 000000….
      I d call this GENOCID.
      Another statistic claims that ,in order to ensure old age pension in the future, there is a shortage of 13 000 (!!!!!!!!!) births each year….
      We really are no better than ISIS.
      As the Swiß could vote for the legalisstion of this wicked sin only the catholic church and a tiny christian political party had the guts to stand up against it.
      After this we left the protestant state church we where members of by birth.
      79% of all voters where for the legalisation of
      abortion.
      Jeßica, im alongside with you in this.
      May your dream come true.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. This is so sad. The problem is that as soon as we leave the path set by God we progress to ever more sin.

        The role of women in God’s design is first foremost and above all else to conceive, nurture, raise and care for children. The purpose of sex is procreation and the establishment of strong emotional bonds between a married couple to allow them to care for children in a safe stable home.

        As a society we don’t have any right to turn sex into a recreational activity with the occasional failure of our contraception as an unfortunate inconvenience. As women we do not have a right to deside whether if we have sex we conceive or not and if we do conceive whether we want to care for a child created by God. Even in the sad but rare circumstances of rape etc.

        A pregnant woman is not a single entity she is one person with a duty to care for another – two equally important people. Any deliberate harm to that child is assault and abortion is murder – full stop. Even in a medical intervention mother and child should be considered equally at every stage.

        Step away from that and you have as you say genocide.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Thank you, Ruth. Your comment echoes my own feelings. This is something that we SHOULD feel strongly about — God forbid the day when we don’t care. Loving the women who go through with an abortion doesn’t mean we hate the murder going on any less.
        Jessica

        Like

  5. Dear Susanne the sad but rate cases you mentioned where the arguments always brought forth in the debate.
    Yet in fact as statistics go abortion is almost always done with the argument of economical or mental troubles of the mother.
    The majority of aborted children is not even from teenage mothers as one would maybe assume. The parents are most often married and often in their thirties.
    I can simply tell my family doctor that i feel overwhelmed by the thought of a baby and he will kill it for me!!!!
    How sick is that?!?!
    Thinking about that really triggers me.
    Pro life activists face fisical agressions if they have a march or so yet the same agressors howl in anguish if an angry farmer shoots a wolf that killed his sheep.
    I gueß its the same over there in the US but all this is just so wrong. And SAD.
    As pro life activists we really want to spread our meßage but i also want to tell any woman who sinned there that she should come forth, confeß and repent and then find forgiveneß even for killing her child.
    Even if our sin is BLOOD RED, JESUS
    can forgive.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. It is terribly sad that such a hideous crime as rape (which I do believe is truly dreadful for any woman but has and added significance for a Christian woman and even more so an unmarried one) should be used to justify another dreadful sin.

    Like

      1. Sadly this crime is endlessly quoted as a justification for murder. And dare I say often by promiscuous women for whom it surely must mean less ?

        Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s